One...Two...Three
Have you ever noticed that just about everything that happens to us, happens in three’s? Whether it is something good or something bad, three always seems like a magic number. When we are lucky enough for the first good thing to happen, we can relax and wait for the other two, but when the first bad thing happens, we have to brace ourselves for at least two more earth shattering events. And it also seems that when you are accident pron- ed, three dumb accidents are bound to happen in a very short time. Now you might be thinking that I am leading up to the fact that I am accident prone. But that is not really true. I don’t have two many problems along that line, but I have a friend that deserves to be chosen Miss Accident Prone of 1985. This friend that I am talking about is like an accident walking around just waiting to happen. Georgia is her name, and falling down is her game
Now it seems that my friend Georgia likes to ski. It also seems like everytime my friend puts on her skis, she ends up with a cast on some part of her person. The last two seasons of en- joying her favorite past time has resulted in casts on her thumbs. The last time she had her thumb in the latest Michael Jackson style plaster of paris glove, I asked her if she was finally going to give up skiing. It was no surprise to me when she answered. “No, I’m going to learn how to fall”. I guess it was the answer I expected to hear from Miss A P of 85.
Well, it seems like walking around showing the world a positive attitude with her thumb pointing up in the air wasn’t enough for the lady who likes to ski. As she was walking down a tricky sidewalk the other day, holding her owie in the air and not watching where she was walking, she fell again. This time she couldn’t blame it on the snow or on the fact that she had those sophisticated bed slats, that they call skis, on her feet. In enters the magic number three, with the results being…one thumb cast, one knee cast and one leg cast. As if walking around with one cast wasn’t enough for Miss AP, now she had to have two more casts. She would be a perfect candidate to model the latest cast designs in this months issue of The Medical Playboy Magazine.
Luckily her injuries are not too serious, because it is not easy to walk into a room and see your friend sitting in a chair looking like she had volunteered her time to the local Boy Scout troop, who are working toward their first aid merit badge in splints and bandaging and not giggle. I am ashamed to say. I did giggle, but luckily so did she.
After spending the afternoon with the lady who cheered me up. I can forsee only one problem as the result of her injuries…trying to keep her thirty year marriage off the rocks. As she sits in her easy chair with both legs and her thumb in casts, she barks orders to her poor husband, on how to run a household, like a drill sergeant giving instructions to his recruits at boot camp.
Actually the set-up didn’t look too bad to me. Miss Prone might not realize it, but she might have found the answer to every woman’s dream…being a full time family drill sergeant. And all it could take is a little volunteer work for the Boy Scouts.
