It's the Little Things that are Out to Get Us
STRESS. All we hear about is stress and how to handle stress in our everyday lives. They have TV programs dedicated to this affliction of modern day man. Magazine articles and modern day medicine also try to deal with what bothers us. Time Magazine, a while back, ran a front cover of a person’s screaming head breaking out of a concrete block and the title: “Stress! Seeking cures for modern anxieties.” Seems they are all trying to find a cure through Science. Well, I equate stress with simple everyday aggravations. The simplest of things around, that drive you bananas. It doesn’t take a Scientist to figure these things out, all it takes is to live everyday life. I’m not sure Science can cure these aggravations
Simple things like the new toilet paper roll that has the end glued down. Now this isn’t:a big thing, but it is aggravating as heck. This new can of fly spray that you just spent $4.50 on, that doesn’t have any p-f-f-f-t in the can, tests my patience. The only solution to this is to wait until the fly lands on your mashed potatoes and throw the can at him. This doesn’t always kill the fly, but it makes you feel better by relieving the stress of being ripped off.
Department stores are a great source of stress, too. Like the coats that are chained to the rack and not a sales person around with a key. And when you finally find someone who has been designated the warden of the month. they stand around and act like you are about to spring Uncle Louie out of prison. Tags that set off the alarm system are fun too. Last Christmas while shopping in one of the local trusting department stores, the clerk forgot to remove one of their sneaky little bugs from a shirt. I went back to have it gift wrapped and set off a buzzer. All of a sudden, a person came running up to me asking if I had a sales slip. This is when I found out first-hand how escaped criminals feel when they are caught. My first thought. when this happened, was to say, “No Maam, I just picked up this shirt in the men’s department, put it in a sack, and came back here to have it gift wrapped…and I certainly won’t mind if you use the courtesy wrap.” But, not knowing whether guards have a sense of humor, I thought better of the idea. Sales clerks in the cosmetic department are aggravating, when they have enough makeup on to be a mannequin in their off hours, and look at you without smiling. (for fear of cracking their face) with the attitude of…Oh my. you do need help. Dearie. Clerks that say, “No I’m sorry, we are out.” without checking for the sale item, that you made an extra trip to the store to buy. This one really lights my candle.
Other things that are bound to test your sanity are…being put on hold and put to sleep with elevator music -expensive items that have to be assembled. with easy instructions enclosed – other drivers who try to make you feel like you are holding up traffic, because you are driving the speed limit – television commercials and programs that assume everyone in the U.S. has the mentality of a two year old, and enjoys themes of sex and violence - full service gas stations that ask if you want gas and your windshield washed waitresses who ask, “do you want water?” having to show two ID’s for a check - and a telephone sales person who sounds like a recording.
The outside world isn’t the only place that is stressful. Home is probably the most stressful place in the world. For instance…going in the garage to start the car after the lights were left on all night - getting in the shower, turning on the water, and discovering someone has borrowed the soap - having to take a telephone message and the pencil that is supposed to be by the phone is gone - and last, but certainly not least. trying to call home with an important message and the line is busy for an hour.
Just think, if Science could come up with solutions for half the simple little everyday things that drive us crazy…in ten years, the life expectancy possibly could be 130 years and climbing.
